Friday, August 20, 2010

Let's Be Honest: Eat, Pray, Kill Myself

Everywhere I go, I hear about this book. I did pick it up one time. I opened it, I read the first page and thought --"it's amazing how much I don't care about this person." But I thought that was just the book. After all, the movie has Julia Roberts and how can a person not care about Julia Roberts?

Answer: Apparently me.

This was the worst movie I've ever seen. I've seen movies I've disagreed with, movies I've disliked enormously because they were banal, insulting or just lame. But this is different. This is a whole new level of "How did I get myself into this hideous mess?" So I'm going to lay it out -- exactly what had me seeing lights of nausea in the theater and then I would love your opinions.

The things that drove me nuts:

* How cruel and self-centered can one person be?
*If you're going to Rome, India and Bali, you gotta know that we're holding out for some pretty lush scenery. This movie was gray -- all the way through
* Let me get this straight -- she totally destroys sweet husband and then is tortured over a child actor she met for .25 seconds while still married? Puhlease.
* The Texas guy in India: Kill me
* All of India: Kill me
* And the most unforgivable thing of all time: If you're going to make something nearly THREE HOURS long -- for the love of all that is decent in this world PLEASE GIVE US SOME KIND OF PLOT. Any kind of plot. Anything!!!

I never, ever thought I'd say this: I longed for the wit and pathos of 27 Dresses.

It was that bad.

But what did you think, readers? Anybody like it? Anybody agree? Anybody smart enough to hold onto their money?



Readers, I want your opinions. Did you see this movie?

11 comments:

  1. Oh you are killing me...that was hysterical!!! I haven't seen it yet and I'm thinking that I may forego it all together now. The only appeal it has to me is that Eddie Vedder provided a song for the soundtrack.

    Thanks for the warning!

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  2. AHAHAH! This was great. I love Julia, but this was funny! =)

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  3. Amy -- I don't think Eddie is going to be acknowledging this one for a long time. I know I didn't hear his voice in the movie and it was a long movie. A looooong movie. Just saying.

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  4. Yea.....another woman who thought this movie stunk to high heaven. As my husband and I were walking out at the end we were saying how boring it was and people behind us were raving about how great it was. Made me want to gag! The only other movie I saw that compared to this disaster was "The Notebook". Another one people raved about. Not us!

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  5. Carol -- I hear you. I will say this: The Notebook was a masterpiece next to this. Cheesey, predictable and loooong, yes. But -- beautiful scenery, decently likable characters and a PLOT allow us to forgive so many things. Eat, Love, Pray, Love -- take note!

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  6. I boycotted both the book and the movie. In my experience, most things that get that much hype aren't worth my time. I'd rather have to miss out on book/movie discussions about it than spend my time wishing for those 3 hours of my life back.

    My sister started the book for her book club and couldn't finish. She hated it.

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  7. I love that I found your blog! I recently read (tried to, anyway) and reviewed because I'd received so many great reviews from friends and family, that I felt compelled to pick it up. Thank god I only spent 5 dollars on it at a used book store. Terrible! I've heard that I should stick it out; or, atleast read the chapter about India. I haven't seen the movie because I haven't finished it. But now that I see this I might not ever. Thanks for an honest review. I appreciate the good and the bad!

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  8. I have not read the book and thought of seeing the movie. I am glad to read your critique and appreciate the honesty. How many can be in the position this woman was and have the finances to be so narcissitic? I understand taking time for your self. Been there...
    Thanks Again.. I am happy to have found your blog. Please check mine out if you have the time.. http://thepauseandeffects.blogspot.com
    Nice meeting you and look forward to your new posts.
    Sandy

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  9. Thanks Beth and Sandy!!! It's great to have you guys here!

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  10. I picked up the book, read a paragraph, immediately put it down and never looked back. I wasn't even tempted to see the movie, despite the great J.Roberts.

    Read 'Tales of a Female Nomad' by Rita Golden Gelman instead. It's what a travel memoir should be.

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  11. I give this movie a 6 out of 10. I see your opinion yet I have to disagree. The first time I saw this movie, I hated it and thought it was boring. After I saw it the second time, I liked it. Maybe the book wasn't great, but I love Julia Roberts. Movie wasn't that horrible.

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